in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
