big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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