The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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