Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
