He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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