no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
