Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
