problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
