I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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