yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
