Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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