All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
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Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
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Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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