its not stalking. its research.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
