she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize