fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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