please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
