So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
