I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize