I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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