I must be too annoying 4 u.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
