marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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