I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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