Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Operation Purity has been aborted
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize