Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
