we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
