Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
