so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
