The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?