I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.