i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
cat food counts as protein by the way
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
