I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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