proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
