he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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