Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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