There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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