The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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