Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  You shut your mouth

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  (313): I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy (1-313): You shut your mouth http://tfl.nu/xp5b
  Replies (34) Good night (1640) Bad night (854)
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  (650): View more from California

  barbara walters just said penis...

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  (650): barbara walters just said penis... http://tfl.nu/ninz
  Replies (10) Good night (2870) Bad night (939)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.

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  (859): I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron. http://tfl.nu/eae7
  Replies (30) Good night (4729) Bad night (902)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.

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  (401): I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped. http://tfl.nu/rhrp
  Replies (60) Good night (1106) Bad night (16344)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum

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  (412): I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum http://tfl.nu/2gzo
  Replies (6) Good night (3994) Bad night (1222)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea

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  (325): suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea http://tfl.nu/q0e7
  Replies (21) Good night (1093) Bad night (4791)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why

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  (507): I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why http://tfl.nu/wixc
  Replies (6) Good night (2617) Bad night (969)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god

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  (662): I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god http://tfl.nu/z3js
  Replies (6) Good night (815) Bad night (1514)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen

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  (508): I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen http://tfl.nu/rd0a
  Replies (16) Good night (1440) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.

  (636): View more from Missouri

  I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.

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  (636): I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB. (636): I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE. http://tfl.nu/x3bf
  Replies (8) Good night (752) Bad night (2005)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.

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  (270): I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him. http://tfl.nu/jwhd
  Replies (1) Good night (1134) Bad night (551)
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  (310): View more from California

  I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.

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  (310): I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't. http://tfl.nu/uo1x
  Replies (3) Good night (1198) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible

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  (801): Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible http://tfl.nu/ks54
  Replies (3) Good night (491) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.

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  (860): My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude. http://tfl.nu/4dzv
  Replies (2) Good night (531) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.

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  (951): It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me. http://tfl.nu/jm52
  Replies (0) Good night (533) Bad night (287)

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