Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize