oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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