You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
