oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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