Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
