just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize