okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
