I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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