Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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