i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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