Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
