just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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