and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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