one two three fourrrrnication!
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Can I color on your dick again?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
